Nightmares

Posted on | November 15, 2008 | No Comments

I’ve been having what seem like nightmares every time I go to sleep but they’re really not. One was an innocent dream about me shopping for the baby yet it was making me toss and turn.

The others are unfortunately about Daddy. In some of them he calls me, in some of them he doesn’t. Either way I wake up hot, sweaty, and disappointed in the realization of my reality.

Ugh, I just want a break from thinking about him and the baby. It’s hard enough to take my mind off either for 5 minutes when I’m awake. Why must these thoughts transfer over to when I’m sleeping? Gosh, I miss my old life so much. I miss my thought train before last Monday. I was over the break up with Daddy, was going out with my friends and had really not a care in the world. Now I worry about and over-analyze/over-think everything.

When I fall asleep I have even started watching movies so I can concentrate on them and not my situation. Horror movies even … hell, I’d love to dream about Jason chasing me for once or Freddy sucking my brains out! Anything is better than dreaming about Daddy at this point, but no success! LOL! I guess real life nightmares are worse than regular nightmares.

Anyway .. arggh the cravings begin. I want pancakes, a bacon egg and cheese sandwich, hash browns and orange juice right now. NOMNOMNOMNOM. I think I’ll grab a bag of breakfast junk and go hang out with my mama for the day.