Not Such Good News
Posted on | March 11, 2009 | 14 Comments
I had a doctor appointment yesterday and there was a little bit of news to be concerned about.
1) I gained 15 lbs in 1 month. 15 LBS IN ONE MONTH!!! I was actually a bit ashamed and embarrassed when the nurse gasped in horror as I stepped on the scale. 
Wow, I’m hungry I’m sorry. I don’t feel that much fatter though. Bigger? Yes. Fatter? No.
My mom really gave it to me nonstop yesterday. “Go on a diet, Bridgette” “Cut back and stop eating so much, Bridgette.” I’m sick of hearing that crap. It’s not like I haven’t considered alternative options already, but I have a fricken human being growing inside of me for cripes sake. Give me a break.
2) I have been having a problem with (tmi) vaginal cramping and really bad pain down there. I get occasional spotting and droplets of blood. It’s hard for me to move around because I feel like I already had my son and I’m so sore to walk. Doc ordered me an emergency ultrasound and visit in 2 weeks. He told me to come in early if the pain gets worse. Argh. Damn damn damn. I was hoping all of this would be smooth sailing. I’m scared as hell now.
3) My blood pressure is up. Doc told me whatever is upsetting me in life to let it go. To lay back in bed, to rest, to not move around much, and to let every thing go. Ok …. I’ll try. I’m trying. I’m not going to lie that things are much more stressful now that I’m worrying if me and my Jacky-poo are OK.
…………………………………..
Speaking of, my friend, S, just called me a few minutes ago. He was so negative to me for some reason. First I referred to my son as Jack to him. He quickly interrupted me and said “Jack? Seriously? That’s the dumbest fucking name ever”.
Ok, we had just had a conversation that his baby’s mom named his son Tagan out of spite which wasn’t the name they picked together. He hates that name and is bitter. Ok, fine. I let it go.
Next topic I mentioned to him how I’m trying to keep my blood pressure down because my doctor ordered it. He quickly said “Well don’t be talkin to Daddy. Don’t be callin him and fighting with him.”
Me: “I don’t talk to him. We don’t call each other and you know that. He’s not a problem to me right now.”
S: “Well that’s because he doesn’t care. He probably won’t even be at the hospital.”
Me: “Maybe he does care, maybe he doesn’t care. The only thing that matters is that I don’t care and I don’t want him there”
S: “Well if he cared about you and the baby he’d call you so obviously he doesn’t. I hate my baby’s mom because she’s an atrocious bitch but at least I care and will be there for my son”
Wow. What’s the point in that? Why was he even trying to go there with me? I wanted badly to just flat out say “Yes you may call and check up on your son, but you have yet to meet him since he has been born over a week ago. You were too busy worrying about whether or not you should fuck this girl that all of your other friends have fucked and how it would make you look if you did than how you would make the trip to see your boy. Also, remember when he was born you called me and the first thing you said was ‘Unfortunately the baby and his mom made it through the surgery OK. I was kinda hoping one of them might die to be honest‘. Who says that even jokingly about their own child?
You haven’t given up the multitude of drugs you brag about taking every day to be a better role model for your son and you haven’t gotten a job in years to help provide for him. You live with your parents so you can’t even give him a home. But at least you call right?”
But I didn’t. Blood pressure down. Meditate. Happy thoughts. Everything zen!.
I simply said “My son does not need a drug addict in his life who is not able to set an example for him. One who will be in and out, up and down and unable to provide for him. My son needs me. I love him and will do anything for him.
S: Subject change.
Yeaaah buddy.
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14 Responses to “Not Such Good News”
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March 11th, 2009 @ 11:44 am
Wow what a hideous conversation. I hope your blood pressure stays down, and people get off your ass about losing weight. You really don’t need to deal with all that stress right now. Stay strong girl.
March 11th, 2009 @ 12:09 pm
Is 15 ppunds a lot to gain when your pregnant. If it is dont feel bad because I have gained a lot of wait.
March 11th, 2009 @ 10:01 pm
I had some fun with eating and gained about 40 lbs total during my pregnancy, and I remember a good chunk of that happened during the last trimester, especially the last month or so.
I hope everything goes OK — stay as calm as you can! (much easier said than done)
March 12th, 2009 @ 4:56 am
Hannah – that conversation was bad and unusual for him to snap at me like that. I didn’t get that upset about it as much as WTF?! Some people are just upset that their lives are shit when yours seems to be going ok so they want to bring you down to feel better. Misery enjoys company!
March 12th, 2009 @ 4:58 am
Paige – I gained 15 lbs in ONE MONTH which is kinda a lot. I’m 5 months pregnant and so far have gained about 20 lbs. I pig out a lot and I’m guilty of not eating the right things. But I eat what I crave and nothing else sounds very appetizing!
March 12th, 2009 @ 4:59 am
Lauren – Thanks! I know my biggest contribute to stress is letting relationship drama get to me. I had made a plan to stay busy to avoid thinking about it much, but now that’s kinda hard since the doctor doesn’t want me moving around a lot! Argh!
March 12th, 2009 @ 10:41 am
I know how you feel! I gained 14 pounds in my 5th month too and thought it was the worst thing ever. I tried to blame it on the holidays and everything but the truth is my appetite was just out of control. I could not stop eating. Luckily for me the bigger I get, the more uncomfortable I feel when I eat so its cut my appetite way back. Its easy for people to tell you to not eat so much and stay away from stress but when your pregnant its just gonna happen. I try to take a nice bath a few time a week and just shut my eyes and block out everything. Hang in there you’ll be ok
March 12th, 2009 @ 1:46 pm
Oh Sara, I just can’t help it. Why eat baked chicken and steamed veggies when I could have a juicy cheeseburger and french fries? I used to eat somewhat healthy before the pregnancy but now its out of the question!
Thanks for the stress tip I will try that
March 13th, 2009 @ 8:58 am
Just found your blog through Cost of Living and I’m definitely adding you to my RSS reader. Wow @ the conversation. Don’t worry about the 15lbs. Its just one of those things that isn’t worth stressing yourself over right now. I hope you’re able to keep your blood pressure down.
March 15th, 2009 @ 2:55 am
Hi Nakia! Thank you for stopping by my blog. I look forward to reading yours as well!
March 16th, 2009 @ 12:33 am
When I was pregnant I couldn't stomach even the thought of anything other than either soup or a mcdonald's cheeseburger.
Everything else made me sick to my stomach.
Then around the 6 month I always wanted toast with strawberry jam and mini-peanut butter cups.. and they had to be mini. lol.
I gained 40 pounds too. Definitely 15 in the first 4 or 5 months, maybe even 20, but I'd go a month and not gain a thing and then gain a whole bunch the next month.
I wouldn't be too worried right now, I think you're supposed to gain between 30 and 35 pounds through your whole pregnancy.
As for your friend, I wasn't sure what to say, which is why I haven't commented until now.
Mostly, just let him go live in his own drama and don't let him drag you down into it.
Stress isn't good for you or JackJack.
That conversation was just outrageous! lol
March 16th, 2009 @ 6:35 am
[...] have been avoiding people lately. Namely my friend, S, that guy I wrote about the other day, Thumper and a handful of other [...]
March 16th, 2009 @ 1:08 pm
My friend isn't much better off than my BD and I'm starting not to like him very much. Infact I'm avoiding him and contemplating on ending the friendship even though it has been going on for 7 years. I just don't feel like we're making any progress.
How long did it take you to lose your pregnancy weight?
March 16th, 2009 @ 6:57 pm
Go with your instinct, if your gut says it's not good to stick around him, then don't/
A healthy relationship vs. a lengthy one? I'd always go with the first.
It took, like a month, initially, but some of it came back. It bothers me sometimes but most of the time it doesn't.
The only thing that really bothered me was that none of my clothes fit after.
Even though I temporarily got back to the pre-baby weight my body shape had changed so it was really different.