Bad Mommy
Posted on | April 17, 2009 | 4 Comments
“WTF AM I DOING?!” I thought Wednesday evening as I lay in bed groaning from an overstuffed and aching tummy. Why am I hurting my baby?
I reflected on all I had eaten that day. One large bowl of cereal for breakfast followed by frozen pizza, rice krispies treats snacks, 1 fillet of fried fish with tarter sauce, 1 plate of nachos, 1 beef and cheese sandwich from Arby’s along with two orders of curly fries, 1 pint of chocolate ice cream, and probably a couple of things I’m forgetting.
What a loser. I felt like crap and here I was steadily gaining weight each Doctor visit. I’ve currently gained 50lbs this pregnancy which makes me nearly 100 lbs overweight and at first I didn’t care. But I quickly realized that night that it’s one thing to do this to myself .. to ruin my body and my health but I realized that I’m also doing it to my baby. Jakobe doesn’t have a choice in how he eats through me and already I’m getting him off to a bad start. Already I’m putting him in bad health.
Wow. I feel like a bad mother. No I don’t exercise and throughout the pregnancy I’ve rarely taken my prenatal vitamins (until more recently). And though I hate to admit it I’ve even smoked a couple of times.
I decided that night to make a change. Not only for myself but for my baby and I have I’m 2 days in.
I plan to exercise as well. To get back in the habit of lifting weights and to walk. Every thing has to be permanent this time. From now until way after I’ve given birth with what I feed him. Not just to look good, but to feel better and to be healthy and raise my baby. I’m doing it I swear!
Wish me luck!
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4 Responses to “Bad Mommy”
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April 17th, 2009 @ 11:22 pm
Bridgette,
Well done on your decision to start exercising. I know it is a lot of work, but it will pay off for a lifetime with your baby.
Julie
April 19th, 2009 @ 8:53 am
Thank you!
April 19th, 2009 @ 9:17 pm
Good plan on the exercising. I dunno about weights but I did a lot of walking when I was preggo. I took Flintstone vitamins (by prescription XD) and gained 50 lbs too. Am was born at 8 lbs and has been the picture of health since. Just do your best and I'm sure it'll all work out.
April 21st, 2009 @ 4:09 pm
Thanks for the encouragement. I'm trying!