So Far So Fail
Posted on | October 6, 2009 | 5 Comments
I just realized so far mommyhood is nothing like I had PLANNED for it to be. I failed right from the beginning when I was pregnant. I promised that I would eat great and keep exercising until it was time to have the baby. Instead I pigged out on junk, was sore, was sick, slept a lot and gained 70 lbs.
I said I was going to lotion my body up 3 times a day every day. I didn’t and now I have stretch marks from my belly button to my boobs.
When I had my son I said I would do more for myself. Shower daily, keep my hair looking nice, dress well, wear make up. I don’t. I shower when I can., my hair is a mess, my wardrobe consists of sweats and tshirts (for one my son throws up on me all of the time, for two its all that comfortably fits me noq) and I only wear makeup when I’m going somewhere special.
Rough, so rough. Fail, so much fail.
At least I’ve stuck with the commitment to only cook every meal I eat. I’m still not working out like I want to and doing all that I would like for myself and my health and sanity.
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5 Responses to “So Far So Fail”
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October 6th, 2009 @ 6:56 pm
I ate like a pig, I rarely put any lotion on my belly (my stretch marks have actually faded quite a bit compared to how they were after birth, but there are still plenty of them there!), I STILL don’t do a great job of keeping myself looking nice a whole 18 months later.
I also told myself I was going to have an all-natural birth, but I ended up with a little bit of pain medication.
I told myself I was going to breastfeed for the first year, and I lasted 2 days.
You’ll eventually find yourself more on top of your life as time goes on, but it can definitely be a very slow process!
.-= Check Out Lauren’s Blog! blog "“There’s No Place Like Home!”" =-.
October 7th, 2009 @ 10:41 am
I think every woman goes through this. It isn’t so much that we fail as it is us just having unrealistic expectations of ourselves. Without having a baby it’s impossible to know how one will change our way of living.
Before I had my daughter I had images of me running around complete with the baby sling, looking just like Angelina Jolie. Well, I did buy myself that sling. I used that sling. I’m just sure I never looked too amazing doing it. Showers were a luxury back then. SLEEP was a luxury.
So yeah, try not to be too hard on yourself.
.-= Check Out Satsuki’s Blog! blog "One Sweet Deal" =-.
October 7th, 2009 @ 11:11 am
Lauren – LOL Oh man I forgot about some of those things too. Yup I said I was going to have a birth with no one in the room but a doc, a nurse and my mom. There ended up being a doc, a nurse, two assistants, my mom and my aunt. I was so drugged up and ready to see my boy that I didnt even care. Oh yeah and the drugs! I said I wasn’t going to have any from an IV.. don’t know what I would’ve done without them!
I wanted to breastfeed too. It was too much hassle trying to get him onto my breast and then much more hassle to pump. So that did not last either!
October 7th, 2009 @ 11:16 am
Satsuki – You’re right. I think not having a child there I kinda expected much more from myself because I wasn’t exactly sure how much I’d have to face, how tired I would be, how stressed.
Like you I saw the celebrity moms in candids looking so fierce .. body snapped back into shape within months, hair looking great, skin and make up flawless, dressed to the T all while carrying their baby and doing errands so I was like “Oh hell yeah! That’s going to be me! KUDOS!”
Except .. uh. No. It’s much harder with no assistants, no millions and also being a single mom!
Thanks
October 8th, 2009 @ 2:35 pm
You’re fucking with your sanity by expecting all of those things from yourself. Most new mothers WITH another adult in the home to help have a hard time showering and primping every day. It’s motherhood- especially new motherhood. Add to that the whole single thing, and you don’t stand a chance, dear. LOL.
It does get easier, and you will (or, at least, I did) learn to be easier on yourself. You do the best you can and you should be satisfied by it.
.-= Check Out hef’s Blog! blog "The History of a Hair "Style"" =-.