Raw and Honest Blog of a New Single Mom

I am a single mother of a biracial baby boy just trying to make it on my own. This journey is hard, yet rewarding. Blogging is my therapy, these words are my heart, and people doing better and being inspired by what I have written is my passion and hope.

20 Years

So it happened and I guess this is the end of our saga. I found out earlier this week that Daddy plead guilty to 5 charges of rape (and the person he raped is worse than I originally though .. and much, much younger.) + 1 charge of drug possession. He will spend 20 years [...]

“Rape”

I’ve been meaning to do better at updating. Really. I have. I’m not dead and I love keeping this blog up. I guess really my life as a single mom .. and well my life period has been uninteresting. Life consists of nothing more than work, sleep, baby.
I’m so proud of Jack. He can can [...]

Evil.

I never posted this here but about a week ago I got a letter from the state saying that my son’s Newborn Screening Test came back that he most likely is carrying Sickle Cell Trait and they asked that me and his father come in and be tested asap as the are certain one of [...]

The Anniversaries, The Timeline

I can’t believe the Anniversary of everything is coming up. Seriously? I’ve been thrown into this whirlwind for one year now? Time flies so fast.
The date I met Daddy: October 5
The day I got pregnant: October 19
The day I found out I was pregnant: November 3
The day I moved in with Daddy and discovered his [...]

Romanticizing the Useless

I have a few topics I want to write about .. I’m going to try to remember them all but I probably won’t. I may spread them out in multiple posts as they come to mind.
First I want to address the depression and the issues I have with Daddy that I wrote about. My problem [...]

Here He Comes Again ..

Funny that right after my last post, after I really let him have it virtually Daddy decided to pop up at the most random of times saying the most random shit. I can’t even be mad anymore because he’s far surpassed frustration territory and has ventured onto funny/sad territory. Seriously he completely wiped away my [...]

Putting My Truth and Honesty Out There

I think by having an online blog causes bloggers to lack authenticity, no matter what they may say. To an extent most bloggers blog to attract readers, to keep them interested, to not offend, to hide from those they know in real life.
While once upon a time I enjoyed writing fiction, I cannot be fake [...]

Sex

I’ve made the vow to myself to give up Fuck Buddy relationships and to take sex and who I do it with more seriously. I’ve only had one true FB, but I’ve had enough relationships that involved sex and didn’t end up being serious to feel like I’ve been merely a cock socket more than [...]

The Focus is on My Son

Day by day things are getting easier. I’m re-adjusting, restoring my mind back to how it was pre-August 17. I think I’m OK now. I’m not going to lie and say I don’t miss him. That it’s not hard for me to see him sign online and fight the want to message him. But I [...]

The Escape

“Sometimes I feel I’ve got to run away
I’ve got to get away
From the pain you drive into the heart of me”
The lyrics to that whole song ring so true to me at this moment. This town, this state is SUFFOCATING. I feel like I’m cooped in with no where to go. I feel like [...]

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